...but I'm glad I did.
First of all, things I did come here to learn:
German. check
history. check
public transportation. check
a different culture. check
Things I did not come here to learn:
punctuality
how to teach english
how to bribe little kids to learn english
how to climb mountains of paperwork
how important stamps can be to any official person
how to prepare and eat white asparagus
what it feels like to fail at school
how to seriously motivate myself. for myself. by myself. (still working on that one)
how to be in love with a german
how to fight in german
how to get out of a bicycle ticket
celcius
the metric system
the value of good customer service
There are many times in my daily life when I stop and think "I never expected to be doing this/learning this/thinking this" and I think back to a conversation with my mom a few years back. She surprised me by saying "You're not who I thought you would be" (in the context of the conversation, it was a good thing...lest you think my mom was somehow telling me what a disappointment I've become!) I just had to laugh and say, I know. I'm not who I thought I would be either. I never in a million years could have imagined the crazy journey that has led me to this place and these lessons. I have certainly spent a lot of time being uncomfortable, unsure and frustrated. I have been lonely, afraid, overwhelmed and humbled. Thank God for that!
I have learned to look at the world from a different perspective, I have learned to examine my priorities and make changes. I have learned a lot about how to respect other people. I have learned that I am not that important. (in the "I'm not the center of the universe" selfish way, not "oh, just forget about me, I'm not important" eeyore way) Today I experienced again a feeling that has been a staple of my life for many years. I was late. Years ago, I was usually at least 10 minutes late everywhere. Since moving to Germany, I average (well, if I am optimistic...) 5 minutes early, but mostly on time. There have been exceptions. Today was one of those times. As I pedalled with burning calves to the uni, I was cursing the fact that I simply lost track of time. I left my apartment 7 minutes after I was supposed to be meeting this professor. All of a sudden, I realized that this crazy, heart-pounding, panicked, thinking of ways to apologize rush has been largely absent from my life as of late. And I don't miss it a bit. I have come to see that when I am on time, it means that I respect that person and the time that they are taking for me. I like who I am, even though its not who I thought I would be. I say thank the good Lord for teaching me all of the things that I didn't expect to learn. ~love
